My Favorite Baby Gorilla

My favorite baby gorilla AKA Artie Lange. A very lovable primate, but damn dude you are on a course of self destruction.

If you don’t know Artie Lange then you are missing out on one of the funnier comedians in the entertainment industry. His long list of credits include – Beer League (2006), Perfect Opposites (2004), Elf (2003), Mad TV, and Dirty Work (1998).

His main gig now is portraying himself in the self-deprecating, cup-cake eating, Jack Daniels swilling role on the Howard Stern show.

This guy is a party animal. Recently I heard him on Sirius Satellite Radio commenting on how he had been out drinking and partying at a bar with friends. He got 45 minutes sleep before havening to be live on air with Howard. No one even knew until he announced it. Every one, including Stern, was amazed at his resiliency, but not me.

Although I could not tell that he was still liquored heading towards hangover heaven, I was not surprised. This guy seems to be on a collision course with the Grim Reaper. Too many drugs, too much booze, and too much over-eating.

Just this past Labor Day weekend he partied and played poker for something like 28 hours straight, got home early Saturday morning and woke up Sunday evening, having slept over 30 hours.

In the process he missed a good friends wedding. As a way of trying to apologize he wrote a very revealing ‘sorry’ letter to his friend and his new bride.

He read this letter on the Howard Stern Show. It shows how much he hates himself. His soul is in a dark place (click images to enlarge).

A personal note to Artie…

Artie, ever since Don Rickles nicknamed you ‘Baby Gorilla’, I have adopted you as my kin folk. I have a suggestion Artie. Come to my rehab center…it is like no other. I will immediately put you on a banana diet. Before long I will have you climbing trees and swinging from vines, and work your fat ass into shape.

I love you like a brother Artie so am bitching at you from that angle.

By the way…the Yankees suck. Go Expos Go…yeah yeah I know they are in Washington now but they suck like they were still in Montreal.

Shalom Biotch

Technorati Tags: Laughter, Humor, Funny, Howard Stern, Artie Lange, Comedy, Comedian

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